Me, Myself & Baby I

Out of the mouths of babes

Checklist on How To Raise A Fantastic Family

Hello, my name is Michael and I agreed to do this guest blog for Lainie.  I’m supposed to “shed insight on how to raise well-behaved, adorable children just like [my] 2 daughters w/ sparkling personalities & great heads on their shoulders.”  Here is my advice…

Before conception

  1. Maintain good health.
  2. Choose a mate with good health that is well-behaved and adorable, with a sparkling personality and a great head!
  3. Address any outstanding issues you have (developmental,   psychological, skill deficiencies, etc.) to maximize your worthiness as a parent.
  4. Address any relationship issues you have with your chosen mate.
  5. Decide with your chosen mate whether you both want to conceive a baby.  If you do, write down why, and proceed to the next step.
  6. Make sure the father is not exposed to any environment that might affect him or his sperm adversely.
  7. Talk through the most likely worst-case pregnancy and baby scenarios with your chosen mate, and write down your agreements.  (If something unfortunate happens, you   will already have some decisions made and will be better able to handle the   situation.  If everything turns   out fine, you will be extra thankful and appreciative.)

After conception, before birth

  1. Make sure the mother is not exposed to anything that might affect her or the fetus adversely.
  2. Make sure the mother visits the OB/GYN as recommended, and follow mainstream medical advice.
  3. Talk and sing to the fetus.
  4. Find out the sex of the fetus.  (This will help get you mentally  prepared, as raising a son has some different things to think about than   raising a daughter.)
  5. Agree on a baby a name with your mate.  (This will be half as hard if you wait until step 4 is done.)
  6. Pray for good health and 20 phalanges.  (It can’t hurt!)

After birth

  1. Make sure your baby (and the nursing mother, if applicable) is not exposed to anything adverse.
  2. Nourish your baby /toddler / child with food and love.
  3. Visit the pediatrician as recommended, and follow mainstream medical advice.
  4. Have lots of fun reading with, playing with, and spending  quality time with your baby / toddler /child.
  5. Lead by example.

Good luck!

Michael is 41, lives in Texas, and stepped on his daughter’s sewing needle the other day.

*  Editor’s Note:  If only it was this easy!  But common sense and a good sense of humor help a lot!


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